time goes by much too fast aaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhh! I have to go into battle sooner than I can catch my breath Weekends tick, but they never last. they never exist. I often wish they actually didn't So I'd be forced to realise that the battle is insane. That there's no way I could go on. Not without a looooooooong break... maybe tomorrow? maybe tomorrow maybe maybe forever I want a break that lasts forever that would be nice... A break where I can really relax take deep breaths feel the sunlight on my eyelids open them and not have to see my worries short breaks just don't seem to cut it I always brood about their end coming too soon.
When will I snap? I'm waiting It's like waiting and thinking about it is somehow a treatment. Temporary respite from madness. Thinking about a problem means I'm sane right? That's what a normal person would do, so therefore I'm a-ok. ready for another day!
I sometimes think about going to fake-prison. not real prison, cuz A: I don't want a criminal record, and B: I've heard it really sucks But it's like prison as a concept from the outside. Like a place you just go to, and are forgotten, and get a bunch of time to think out your brain gunk. It would probably manifest itself into worse brain gunk if I stayed in a prison cell though. Hence I want fake-prison. Fake-prison would be like my normal life, except more free. I'd be free to do whatever I wanted to, and if I dared to, I could even take steps towards places I've never been, or even envisioned going to before that very spontaneous decision. I would step outside and not worry about work or nothing. Just take a breath, and walk the other way that day. Maybe I would even hear the birds, those exist I've heard. I'd be walking slower than usual, and there would be buildings on either side (most likely). Sometimes there would be a graveyard on one side, and sometimes the ocean. If I looked up I'd see the clouds. A very strange day that would be. Fake-prison would encompass the entire globe. I wouldn't be allowed to leave, and I wouldn't be allowed to do anything overly crazy inside it either (like murder). I would however be allowed to people watch. See how others like me walk around on their legs! Each with their own story, all of them also in fake-prison!