Lao Tzu wavers into existence infront of Bojack with a most calm expression.

"a...are you?"

Lao Tzu nods... "I am"

", so I'm having one of those moments huh... Well I guess you're as good as any to help me get in touch with my uh.. inner hydration"

Lao Tzu says nothing... 

"Classic Lao Tzu!", Bojack says cracking a very forced smile that lasts just a bit too long.

"ok... _please_ help me here... I'm literally dieing for some good advice to come out of my inner voice that isn't just drink and keep drinking, and I _know_ my subconscious would be thinking the same thing or you wouldn't be here!"

Lao Tzu raises his palm as if to indicate it's his turn to speak.

"The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step."

"oh... my goooood, of _course_ you're just gonna spew quotes, that's all I know about Lao Tzu... Look! here! I'll take ONE step right now. I can do that for you... or me whatever!"
With a largely exaggerated step Bojack pauses midway in order to challenge Lao Tzu's statement and likewise humiliate him to such a degree that he would be forced to waver out of existence in shame at such a zinger.

Lao Tzu remains standing, looking unfazed, maintaining his gaze at Bojack.

"what?... I did the step! I want this to work!"

Lao Tzu wavers out of existence... 

"Yeah thought so..."

"This way..." Lao Tzu utters standing next to the door.

"Woah, hold your horses... Why do I need to go outside? I was starting to feel kinda chummy right here!", Bojacks glances at the bottle in his hands.

[A mexican standoff between Bojack, the bottle in his hand, and a hallucination of Lao Tzu occurs]

"ok fine! let's go... I have to check the mail anyways!... but if I meet anyone else, promise me you'll 'poof' away ok?"

--- a few minutes later at the beach ---

"So what _am_ I supposed to be doing exactly?... and how long do these hallucinations usually last?!"

"A good traveler has no fixed plans and is not intent on arriving."

"Riiight, right... I know _I_ would work a lot harder knowing there was some sweet sweet green grass on the other side of that fence waiting for me!"

Todd appears behind Bojack and LT "hey! who're you talking to?"

"oh.. just... Lao Tzu!... myself mostly"

"oh I see!" Todd approves. "I do that too sometimes... Is he standing right there?"

"yes, yes he is."

"so if I were to step inside Lao Tzu like thiiiis..." Todd shuffles to where the Lao Tzu hallucination is standing.

"Todd! Don't do that that's weird!"